reciprocity

I volunteer at a conference called Hugh O'Brian Youth Leadership just about every year. Although it is an international organization, I have participated in the Central Pennsylvania seminar almost exclusively.

HOBY, as alumni call it, seeks to engage one tenth graders from all participating schools in critical thinking and volunteer service. Our goal is to encourage students to consider how to think, not what to think. I believe in this goal to be worthy of every single second of sacrifice made by the volunteers who organize the conference.

However, this year, I returned from the conference pondering the concept of reciprocity. What do the HOBY volunteers get out of volunteering? Are we being honest with ourselves about how much we receive and give?

Being honest about what one receives as a volunteer is important. Without acknowledging this reciprocity, a volunteer risks a) becoming arrogant about how wonderful a thing she is doing because she realizes she receives at the same time and b) becoming burnt out from giving to things that do not encourage her spirit.

Another danger lurks when reciprocity is not acknowledged. A volunteer can make the service project more profitable for the herself than for the people who are supposedly benefiting from the service.

I have a lot to consider about my role in HOBY. More to come. I would definitely appreciate your thoughts on the matter of reciprocity in service if you have any. :)

Shalom.

science and art

It took me forever-- or what felt close to it-- to commit to walking down this path. Call it indecision or curiosity, but I explored a lot of other roads before I picked this one. And while those other roads were interesting and sometimes fancy, the path of becoming a doctor seems to be the only one that has managed to keep my attention for very long.

But now, the pre-med classes are over, and *only* the MCAT and application process await.

Despite my long courtship with medicine, what really attracts me-- what keeps me interested and willing to trudge through silly labs and long finals-- is medicine's constant and delicate balance of the concrete and abstract.

Did you know that there is a protein that essentially walks around in our cells on tracks carrying products of cellular metabolism? And even though we do not know why many of our cells do not regenerate on their own, researchers at Wake Forest have created functional heart cells using what sort of looks like a color printer? There is so much concrete scientific knowledge to learn, I could never even hope to keep up with every corner of it.

And yet, so much of medicine is more or different than this--- less defined, more abstract, terribly messy and real and amazing and terrifying. I recently discovered this website, 6YearMed, courtesy of L's blog. In a smart, witty, and profound way, this pediatrician speaks about the joys and deep heartbreaks of the art of medicine. Her knowledge and experience far surpasses my own.

A best friend of mine, B, said to me a couple years ago, "Amy, you just need to pick something that seems really hard to you, and go for it. Maybe then you won't get bored."

I think I found my choice. And I don't think there will ever be good reason to be bored.